Friday, March 18, 2011

The Way?

I wish there was a way for all of this change to happen without a lot of work. There are days that I just don't feel like figuring out why I want to eat when I am not hungry, trying to figure out when to stop eating because I am satisfied, trying to figure out why my voice is so mean and why I can't get it to stop. Why are we so hard on ourselves and treat ourselves so badly. It is just crazy to me that I can be so mean to myself. That I allow this stupid voice to tell me that I don't deserve to be happy and that I might as well eat because it's the only thing that is really there to comfort me. It doesn't make sense that I am so put together and in charge in other areas of my life. There is no doubt that with time and reflection that I can kick this food addiction and allow myself to be free of this constant battle. I love the comment in one of Geneen Roth's books that I am not on this earth to focus on losing the same 20 lbs over and over again. My life means more than that. I am here to live life to the fullest. And to do that I have to take care of myself in many different ways.
  • Be kind to myself.
  • Eat for proper nourishment so I can have the energy to live life to the fullest.
  • Exercise to keep myself strong.
  • Be good to others around me.

No where in there does it indicate that I have to live life focused on food, when I can get food and what I can get. Fulfillment does not come from a Twinkie!!! It comes from trusting other people, loving and being loved by others, and connecting with people. Not the slice of pizza on my plate.

These are the messages I have to remember every day. And I can do this!! And I deserve this!!


  1. Oh, Ali, I just don't know!!! I wish I had an answer. Believe me, I have explored this exact concept every which way for the past two weeks. Why do we sabotage OURSELVES? We aren't hurting anyone except us.If you ever figure it out, let me know. One thing I know for sure you are right about...YOU do deserve this...and so do I...and so does everyone else in this exact same situation.

  2. Hey girl, Haven't seen a post from you in awhile. How's it going? Hope you're still plugging along on this crazy journey. I've been at a rest stop for awhile, getting back in gear tomorrow.